I have noticed in some of my family members, who've been through struggles in life, to extremely "cling" into their sad emotions! They don't want let go of it. It almost feels like they feel safe and secure with their emotional "miseries". I have searched the net and found this is a common phenomena in many people. I was wondering if there is any scientific paper written on this subject. I don't know the proper terminology for this behavior. I was hoping someone can shed some light. Thanks,
You are right, and consolation often backfires. this is for 2 reasons.
- We as human beings, want to be witnessed, heared. Few year ago a video based on research work of Megan Devine went viral over internet.
- Lot of positivity we say, is actually "toxic positivity". It make our pain invalidated, disbelieved, or may have a discriminatory "bad vibes unwelcome" approach. Toxic positivity may oppress people from telling their problem and finding a solution.