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Why do people sometimes not understand that there are other ways of dealing with depression? I have done everything I know that I can do for this person. I've helped a few of my friends stop their cutting and stuff and I love listening and helping them and helping them figure out other soulutions for dealing with their emotions but I'm having trouble with this one

Do you think I should tell my friend's parents now?

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closed as off-topic by mrt, Sydney Maples, Arnon Weinberg, Seanny123, AliceD Dec 29 '15 at 21:57

This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:

  • "Questions about the behavior of an individual person are off-topic. If you are concerned about a potential medical issue, please seek the advice of a medical professional. For more information, see Why was my self-help question closed as off-topic?." – mrt, Sydney Maples, Arnon Weinberg, Seanny123, AliceD
If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

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    $\begingroup$ I'm so sorry that you are struggling right now. My advice is to reach out to someone close to you who can help, whether it be a friend, mentor, or peer counseling service such as 7cups.com. This website is not set up to give personal advice. $\endgroup$ – Sydney Maples Dec 29 '15 at 0:58
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Each person deals with and reacts to psychological issues, including depression, differently. It's not your fault that the other person isn't finding your approach helpful. Also remember that symptoms of depression include negative thinking and trouble focusing, so don't blame yourself.

Secondly, sometimes you have to tell another person what is going on when you are seriously concerned about another person's well-being. Tell someone you trust. This person should be able to listen and make good choices about what to do with the information you tell them. They should be able to understand that you want to respect this person's feelings and privacy and concerns about expressing these to anyone. However the person you tell should know whether or not it is a wise decision to intervene, and how.
Perhaps they could give you advice on how to better understand and help your depressed friend in a way you hadn't thought of before, provided the situation is not too serious.

If your friend is in danger, you need to tell someone.

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Do these friends that you are helping have any other friends in whom they have confided? If there are other people who already know, and who are your age and potentially going through similar things, it can help to talk to them. This also has the benefit of not telling anyone your friend might not want you to.
One possibility would be to contact a counselor/therapist - if you are at school they will likely have one available to whom you can go in full confidentiality, and who will be trained and experienced to help.


If you believe that your friend may be in danger, for example suicide, or that things are getting out of control, they need help, and it is reasonable to break a promise of confidentiality if it could save their life. If you are in the UK, you can call the samaritans on 116 123


Also, please look after yourself, even if you don't have depression or any of the feelings that you are helping your friends with, it can be hard. Any feelings of blame towards yourself, guilt, uselessness are understandale but they do not apply. you are doing amazingly for helping these people, and in some cases even stopping self harm. The samaritans number isn't just for people thinking of suicide, it's for people in need of help, and this is very understandable with so much going on, and helping so many people. And, thank you. Even if you're not experiencing appreciation from your friends just yet, you have done an incredible thing for them; making their lives better, and stopping them hurting themselves. Please don't hesitate to reach out for help, for any of you.

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